To be, or not to be…popular that is.

To be, or not to be…popular that is.

How powerful is the need to be popular? It certainly feels like whatever I have

to say in this context that leans against the virtues of popularity is going to present a serious uphill battle at best. In our culture, popularity seems to be the supreme gift, the brass ring, the key to the castle, everyone’s hope, and (here I go) at what cost?

Here is a statement of intent for the positive message (believe it or not) for this blog if you haven’t already bailed on it in the first 20 seconds after my question at the end of the first paragraph, with your “you’ve got to be kidding” sign flashing.

For the record: To be, or not to be popular is quite simply the wrong question.

Try this question on: If you don’t follow your path, which may or may not reap a certain amount of recognition, or popularity, will you ever be able to get beyond the sometimes inescapable life question – what’s the point?

I spent a bit of my earlier years living in what’s the point land, and I wouldn’t wish that on anybody. Irrelevant of the few highs (and to many lows) I was experiencing, being in that state of mind basically embodied such thrilling human traits as anxiety, procrastination, indecision, indifference, egotism, and a myriad of other self-destructive tendencies that we’re all capable of.

So how does this “state of mind” tie into the question of being popular or not?

Here are a few facts!

To begin with, it’s imperative for you to understand that there’s a billion dollar industry out there dedicated to convincing you that if you’re not in

vogue, in fashion, in step with the times (that would be their version of the times), a happening and seriously popular kind of guy or gal, you’ve failed, miserably! (It’s hard not to fall to a cursed-word response to that ideology)

So let me go to one of the most successful and popular icons of the last few decades, Steve Jobs, and give you the quote he designed with his company for you to spin on as far as thoughts on a personal image for the new millennium.

“Here’s to the crazy ones, the misfits, the rebels, the troublemakers, the round pegs in square holes…the ones who see things differently—they’re not fond of rules…You can quote them, disagree with them, glorify or vilify them, but the only thing you can’t do is ignore them because they change things…they push the human race forward, and while some may see them as the crazy ones, we see genius, because the ones who are crazy enough to think that they can change the world, are the ones who do.”

OK, maybe you’ve already read this and said yeah, I got it – I got it. And yes, it’s always cool to rip a killer quote from an icon. But let me dramatize two major points and tie this to the popularity enigma.

One) Popularity is not the anti-christ – that is certainly not my agenda here. But…you need to understand that seeing popularity as the end-all-be-all has the potential to be incredibly self-limiting.

Worrying about going against the grain could end up cutting back the strongest tool in your arsenal – your uniqueness, and you just don’t want to go there!

When I first started seriously writing, most everything I shared with people derived the comment, that doesn’t sound like you, and it was dead on. I was writing in hopes of pleasing everyone and ended up sounding like a lackluster imitator as opposed to someone with an obvious point of view.

Politicians are also a great example in this context. For them, it’s all a popularity contest, and not all, but most of them will say anything to achieve their goal. Look around with everything that’s been happening in this country – how’s that approach they take working out for you?

Bottom line; the moment you sway from who you really are, what you really believe about yourself, and what you feel your purpose might actually be, especially for popularity’s sake, you lose personal power and you’re seriously headed for becoming a cog in the infamous wheel, which cycles right back into what’s the damn point?

Do some people beat this loss of power and still become incredibly popular – of course. I’d be in fantasy land not to see that.

But the percentage of people that win that volley as opposed to those who do not, taking the course of popularity or die, is absurdly small.

Think about that – do the math – and then lay out your priorities.

Two) There’s also an extraordinary (and very timely) paradox happening here.

To wit: Not being satisfied with the status quo has never really led to any kind of popularity. But in today’s environment, that mindset is becoming passé.

The Paradox: Not striving to be popular has a greater chance of helping you to become popular in the new millennium.

Re-read the Steve Jobs quote and let it sink in this time. Different is not only in demand, it’s in vogue! And let me expand that comment and get to the point I’ve been striving to make.

Not just different, but unique is in vogue. 

Bottom line (once again): Anything that distracts you (including the drive to be popular) from being unique in your endeavors is turning out to be more counter-productive than not in this day and age, which has been labeled the Conceptual Age. I’ll end this with a couple of hits from an icon who saw this very early on.

“Imitation is suicide.”

“To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment.”

–Ralph Waldo Emerson